Hair Gel

I am quite suited to parent boys, I believe. Growing up with two younger brothers, I learned a lot about sports, G.I Joe figures and the fact that bathrooms will never stay clean for very long.

I also believe it is best that I had boys because I lack many of the skills that would be helpful to a mother of girls. I know nothing about clothes, and don't care well for the ones I buy. I don't get excited about shoes and will just wear one pair until they fall apart. I also have absolutely no idea what to do with hair - mine or anyone else's. I even tried to simply put hair clips in one of my friend's daughters' hair and failed miserably. Therefore, I thought that by having boys, I'd escape having to deal with the more "hairy" aspects of childraising.

I was wrong.

These boys grow hair at an alarming rate. Alarming because child haircuts are absurdly expensive. However, the boys seem to start getting rather shaggy just weeks after their last cut. While lamenting this at my parents' house, it was suggested to me that I start experimenting with hair gel. Product?!? At age three?!? For my BOYS?!?

It became inevitable just a day later, when Lucas awoke with hair unfit for Don King. Unable to tame it with traditional methods, I dug a green bottle of stuff out of Noah's bathroom cabinet. After reading the directions, I gave it a whirl. The results were phenomenal. My unkempt little monkeys became respectable, well-coiffed young men right before my very eyes.



For two days now, they have received innumerable compliments on their coiffure. I still find them trying to eat chalk and wearing their underpants backwards, but there is a sort of sophistication about them now. All because of our new friend - hair gel.