I’m not going to lie to you, we’ve been having some challenging times over the last month or so. It is the same old developmental phase where everything goes haywire because their brains are growing and they are acquiring new skills. This has provided us with many bouts of whining and defiant behavior, which has left me, well, exhausted.
Lucas tends to roam down the whiny path, while Ethan treads the defiant one. Lucas has been known to dramatically roll around on the floor saying “I’m toooo tiiiiiiiiired,” when asked to do some things for himself, such as pull up his pants. Of course he somehow musters up enough energy to run out of the bathroom and jump on the couch as soon as he ditches the pants. Ethan likes to push the boundaries and specifically do things he knows he’s not supposed to do. Then he reports on it to gauge my reaction. For example:
Ethan: Mommy, I did something bad in the bathroom.
Me: (thousands of images running through my mind) What?!
Ethan: I drank the soap.
Me: (Poison control numbers flashing through my head)What?!
Ethan: Well, I licked it.
Me: You only licked it? Once?
Ethan: Yes. Was that a bad thing?
Me: Um, it wasn’t a good thing.
Ethan: Oh. (skips off with a smile)
Me: (deep breath #176 of the day)
Despite these daily challenges, I have been madly in love with these two little stinkers lately. They are especially cute and funny and full of life lately. What really stands out in my mind is something for which I think parents of twins have a special appreciation. These two are demonstrating such a love for each other – my heart just melts. Today Lucas got scared of one of our neighbors and began to cry. Ethan ran over to him and threw his arms around him, holding him tight while Lucas hid his face on Ethan’s shoulder. Ethan just held on, protecting and caring for his brother. I was so touched.
Just a little while later, Lucas and Ethan were both running to the park when Ethan tripped and fell. Lucas first ran past him – his opportunity to pull ahead in the race – but then doubled back and offered Ethan his hand. Ethan brushed himself off and they ran the rest of the way together hand in hand. I could have died a happy mommy right then and there.
Later when we went to Costco (which is not usually part of a fabulous day) an elderly woman approached us and said to me: “Aren’t you lucky to have two boys! They are beautiful!” I was surprised how meaningful this was to me. I never care what people say to me. I often hear the comments like “You have twins? Oh my God, that must be so hard!” I know this kind of comment rubs some of my friends the wrong way, but I usually answer “You have no idea!” Hey, I’m open to any acknowledgement of how hard I work! I also don’t really care when I hear, so very often, “So are you going to try for a girl?” I know many women think that every mother should have a daughter. That just doesn’t resonate with me. So I was surprised when this particular comment touched me. But I think it just struck me as the perfect acknowledgement of what I was feeling today, and someone else gave it voice. I just love being the mom of these two boys.
I am so very lucky, and yes, they are so very beautiful.
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